Friday, March 12, 2010

Inside look on : The Sendai drinking club

Today, in the first segment of the INSIDE LOOK series, a fearless reporter goes behind the scenes of one of the most secret and underground institutions in Sendai. Let’s see where it takes us:

SENDAI - (AP) Let me give you an inside look into the Sendai drinking club. A very exclusive club that was formed by 3 men who like drinking alcohol, 2 legendary South-Africans and a simple man that grew up on the mean streets of Montreal-North. Before the drinking club was founded a little more than a year ago, Sendai, aka the city of trees, was home to: a book club, a dying soccer club, a cricket club, a knitting club, a poker club and maybe even a freaking spoken word club. A random visitor of Sendai might have been tempted to call Sendai: the city of boredom. That was until the 3 alcoholics found themselves on a boat at the same time and discovered that they have a common passion: getting completely crunk.

Quickly, the rules were laid out and the drinking began. Every Thursday, the members would meet and engage in a 2 hour nomihodai (all you can drink) and consume as much alcohol as it is possible in that short period of time. Needless to say, a member who would happen to fall behind and drink slower than the others would get his manhood questioned and would eventually be considered unworthy to be a part of such a beautiful gathering of drinking aficionados.
The choice of Thursday seemed natural, as it is a way to start the week-end early. The members say that the lack of productivity on Friday is never questioned by their Japanese co-workers as Japanese people seem to have many other things to do before they worry about the productivity of foreign teachers of English.

In addition to the ‘drink as fast as the others or you’re a moffie rule’, there are 3 other rules:

1- Every member is allowed 1 week off… in the year.
2- Every member can call an automatic nomihodai anytime, as long as it is announced 24hrs before
3- You must be annoying, disrespectful, ungrateful, irritable and basically a despicable prick

The club now has 4 regular members, as an Australian was added to the mix. When listening to the member’s conversations, one can really see that this club is made of refined, educated and classy gentlemen from very different countries and backgrounds. The night where we were granted permission to observe the group, the topics of conversation mostly fell under one of the following:
- Sports
- Legal age of consent
- Different sexual acts that may or may not involve transsexuals
- The sexual orientation of the French-Canadian member, who is apparently known for wearing V-necks

There is also a semi-regular Japanese member, who comes when he isn’t busy cutting the hair of Sendai’s rich and famous. The Sendai drinking club also had some guest stars here and there. An Aussie, a Canadian, a couple women, but it became quite clear that this club will remain what it is and what it always has been: an exclusive, highly secret club revolving around the 4 guys who can maintain a level of drinking never heard of in the Tohoku region. Their pursuit of excellence in the field of drinking is comparable to the domination that the legendary Tiger Woods held onto his sport before word came out that he was a freaking pervert. These men, considered by many as men amongst men, have graduated Magna Cum Laude from the Suntory University and are part of what must be, the best ALT club that exists in Japan.

A.Nonymous.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I believe there to be some inaccuracies in this report. Notably the 24 hour rule regarding the automatic nomihoudai...

I has been said that such is the drive and determination of these pioneers, these men amongst men, these legends, that all that is needed is 3 hours notice for them to unite in their pursuit of total and utter debauchery.

P. said...

I am going to contact the reporter and ask him to clarify this situation.
I too have heard that these men are considered the livers of a generation. Legends if you will.

Unknown said...

J'adore ton ironie PY! Longue vie à ton foie...

Angela said...

Enjoyed the glimpse inside the imbibing rituals of the young, the restless, the fool and the hardy - however I take HUGE offense to the use of c**t. Please amend your bylaw and replace with any of the following: prick, dick, asshole, buttwipe, fuckhead, asswipe, douchebag.

Respectfully,

Your brother's wife and niece's mother,

-A-

Yang Kuo said...

I believe there to be some inaccuracies in this report. Notably the 24 hour rule regarding the automatic nomihoudai...



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